Kia Ora and welcome to the double edition (yes you are in for a treat) of the CJ Weekly. Weeks seven and eight have been, without a doubt, our worst weeks on the road so far. It all started off swimmingly, getting to Martinborough for my beautiful cousins wedding, eating fish and chips with the fam and having two real showers every day. Even got to use a hair dryer. It was all bloody great. And then we got norovirus.
OUR FAVOURITE PHOTOS (or should we say photo). The only photo we got before norovirus claimed us.
OUR WEEKLY EXPENSES
TOTAL $5,816 (combined - weeks one to eight).
$586 for week seven only
$591 for week eight only
OUR WEEK SEVEN & EIGHT VIDEO
Would only include footage of us vomiting, crying, and sleeping so we will spare you.
FIVE THINGS WE LOVED
Shani and Andy's wedding and seeing the extended whanau. The legends served late night snacks at their wedding (more genius than the genius bar at Apple) and the pork buns were absolutely epic.
Life before norovirus.
Games night with the fam. I love being from a family that enjoys a good games night and I'm so grateful that James also shares that same love (although to be honest I probably wouldn't marry a non board-gamer). Also really loved when we were playing Catchphrase and James was trying to explain Bareback and ended up explaining Brokeback Mountain by mistake. I mean I guess they are almost the same right?!
The really lovely nurse and doctor at the Rotorua Hospital. They hammered me with meds, fluids and a thousand lemonade ice-blocks.
The most amazing girls who worked at the Rotorua Caravan Park and went above and beyond to look after us. I remember checking in on our first night one and saying "just one night please - we're just going to rest up while my partner isn't feeling too well and should be off tomorrow". In the end we ended up staying almost two weeks. You know those permanents you see at the campgrounds? The ones that are set up with their pot plants, floor-mat and all? Well that was basically us.
FIVE THINGS WE DIDN'T LOVE (we couldn't cut these down to five)
James saying "one by one - it's going to get us".
Norovirus getting us one by one and knocking out 9/12 of us in the house.
Finding out the bride and groom (Shani and Andy) also got norovirus.
Realising I'm a crying vomitter. Can't vomit without crying apparently.
James admitting me into hospital.
THREE THINGS WE FOUND FUNNY
Me throwing up on James. Wasn't funny at the time but now I can look back on it and laugh. So how was that chunky vom all over your brand new fitbit strap Jim?
James throwing up in the middle of the night and then mid vom hearing a noise in the tree above him. He continued to vom, thinking nothing of the possum watching him. BUT THAT'S WHERE IT GETS INTERESTING GUYS. FOR IT WASN'T A POSSUM AT ALL. IT WAS A ROOSTER. A rooster in a tree watching him throw up. Is it just me or does that seem like a great title for a Haiku?
James walking down to the closest jetty for sunset one night and meeting an eight year boy who kept asking him, "Can I have your camera", "No", "Can I have your drone", "No", "Can I have your phone", "No", "Can I have some money then", "No". Five points for his perseverance though.
FIVE THINGS WE PONDERED
Why do the Pak N Save Sticky Club cards only work in the South Island? Doesn't the North Island want to save money too?
How many people can actually fit a fitted sheet? Let's be honest here.
How many people put their fitted sheet on their bed, turn it around and then turn it back to how it first was. EVERY BLINKING TIME.
If Robert DeNiro got Norovirus would he be called Robert DeNoro?
What is the most commonly agreed to term for ice-blocks? Popsicles? Ice Lollies? Icey Poles? I'm pretty firm on ice-blocks but also thinking this could be a contentious topic.
THE WEEKLY TALLY
And that's a wrap for weeks seven and eight. And hopefully a wrap on norovirus for life. Did you know norovirus is so contagious it's actually caused cruise trips to be cut short and closed entire hospital wards and schools. So maybe 9/12 in the house wasn't so bad after all.
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